Stub Hub!

I entered the "lottery" to buy Ice Bowl or NHL/AMP Winter Classic tickets. I was notified that I didn't win. I opted to buy the HSBC party tickets, which were cheaper and warmer. Essentially, you get to watch the game that's being played at Ralph Wilson Stadium between the Sabes and the Penguins (Penguins is practically chickens--scroll down, look for Hobo) in the arena. Anyway, I was notified that they found extra tickets and that I did win. I almost gave them to my hockey nut, fartin' cousin but then I thought...this bitch is pretty much sold out...get money! Within an hour, I sold my tix for almost four times what they were worth. Awww yeah! Some sucker from Chicago bought them even though they were obstructed view. I said so up front. Reading is fun-da-mental!

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Now playing: Urge Overkill - Sister Havana
via FoxyTunes

Hair

I had an uncle who worked this look in the mid '70's. My bad hair days amount to a Linc comparison.

Hey Dere Hi Dere Don't Tase Me Dere!

I'm poking fun at the Baaahflo Polish connection but the reality is this past week a 40 year old Polish dude who was trying to settle with his mother in Canada experienced death-by-taser. Their problem was that they didn't understand the logistics of navigating the airport in Vancouver. That prevented an efficient meeting. They also didn't get that we live in a new world where you can be killed at the scareport. For the full story click here
(It includes a nearly 10 min. long video)

On the video you hear authorities saying that the man speaks Russian and they need an interpreter. Hey genius, you should have got that interpreter about 9.5 hours before. By the time the guy started getting antsy, he'd been held ten hours. Oh and by the way betch, he spoke Polish until the storm troopers tasered his dupa!

Something along the same lines happened in the Arizona airport about a month ago. A well-to-do woman who'd been in rehab spazzed over missing a connection. Authorities jumped on her, handcuffed her and left her alone. She'd been drinking and ended up choking herself to death.

We're really doing something about those terrorists aren't we? They must have changed the definition to foreigners who don't speak English and desperate housewives with substance abuse issues.

Cryin' Shame

Unfortunately, I can't locate the image but could people stop literally crying over sports losses? The cover of the New York Post recently featured some little tool from Babylon, Wrong Island boo-hooing over the Mets getting knocked out of the play-offs. I heard some tearful grown woman doing as much on an audio clip via CBS news. What's wrong with these people? Granted the little tool is only 6 years old and is now a "celebrity" after having his mug all over the place. But the adult? Come on! There are far greater tragedies in the world than loser sports teams. Those dudes still get a serious paycheck at the end of the day. I'm down with the NHL program but you'll never see me shed real tears over losses--believe me being a Sabres fan is a tough task but I take it in stride. It's called balance and awareness of the world beyond sports, beyond the U.S. Get real people!

p.s. Gore Vidal interview on Canadian TV's The Hour, he rules.

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Now playing: Luscious Jackson - Naked Eye
via FoxyTunes

25 Top Documentary Films Named

I'm a docs fiend. I'll watch just about anything if it's a documentary. This probably stems from not having cable as a kid and being left to my own devices--public television programming--much of it about war. "David L. Wolper Presents..." was always a fave. The International Documentary Association named its best of, which can be viewed here. Bowling, Inconvenient, good choices. Crumb is amazing. Maysles Bros. rule. Grey Gardens is one of their films--watching that you feel sorry for Jackie O's as the skeletons are dragged out of her family closet. A few on the list I haven't seen but will do so. I'm surprised the 7 Up series wasn't named. It's the pre-cursor to reality TV and 49 Up will be on PBS this week. The director has worked with the same kids from the age 7 to 49--their lives are seen warts and all. It's really a study in class and outcome in British society.

Quote of the day comes from Buffalo's Craiglist:
"This is why the social environment here is jam-packed with men (and women) who reek of Labbatt Blue, cheap cologne and desperation."
from the Rants and Raves section

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Now playing: Stereophonics - Maybe Tomorrow
via FoxyTunes

I Shook the Hand of the "Most Dangerous Man in America"

Okay, so I'm burning some music to I-Tunes so I can give under utilized CD's to Goodwill to de-clutter my crib. Of course, I'm digging into some craft brew. Tonight's selection is from Middle Ages Brewing and it goes by the name of Black Heart Stout. Dark as molasses with a very satisfying malty finish. I highly recommend it.
So what do I mean by the headline? I've known about the career of Buffalo actor and labor organizer Manny (Emanuel) Fried for years. He came to my attention after I found out he appeared in the film Buffalo 66. He's the donut clerk who interacts with Billy (played by Vincent Gallo) toward the end of the film. I learned from a colleague that he was called before the House Un-American Activities Committee (HUAC) in Buffalo to answer charges in the 1950's. He gave the Committee hell and they never bothered him again. Although the F.B.I. was on him for the nearly the rest of his life. He's 94 now and is still a delegate to the AFL-CIO. Anyway, he's in a one man show from Road Less Traveled Productions called Boilmakers and Martinis. It documents his life as he reflects on his marriage to a local socialite. Fried discusses the ensuing conflicts between his union position and the toll it takes on his relationship and the lives of his children. It's a truly fascinating story! The headline is in reference to a story he told about a Catholic priest who tried to warn the working faithful that Fried was nothing but a "low life" Commie. Given Fried's age, this could be his swan song so I cleared my calendar.
I had the pleasure of interacting with him. He was using a walker due to recent hip surgery and was talking to a few people in the lobby (the Market Arcade is loaning space to RLTP). He finally announced that he would see them later. He made his way over to a bench. I tried to get into the theater but was told that seating wasn't available just yet. I sat on the bench next to the old gentleman. I thought it was him, but I wasn't sure. Finally, I asked him if he was Manny Fried. He said yes. "Wait a minute, this is your show and you can't get in?". He chuckled and explained that he enters after the audience because the Market Arcade doesn't have a traditional backstage area. I told him that I was excited to see him on stage because I had never done so. He talked about his last appearance in "Tuesdays with Morrie". He was very gracious.
After the show, a Q & A opportunity arose so of course, I raised my hand and stated that he'd been called before HUAC in Buffalo and asked why he didn't address this directly in the show. He said that he had but it would take 2.5 additional hours to discuss so the producers asked that he didn't. He explained that he questioned the validity/legality of HUAC's existence. He asked that he be indicted so he could test his theory. This made the Committee nervous and they didn't bother with him directly. An enlarged letter of encouragement from Albert Einstein during this time period appeared as part of the sparse stage set. He explained that the letter was in reference to his HUAC appearance. After the show, I asked him to sign my program so I could donate it to the Library. He obliged and I thanked him for sharing his story and shook his hand. He is one righteous dude and I'm so glad I had a chance to see him.

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Now playing: The Doors - End Of The Night
via FoxyTunes

They're Chicken Wings, not "Buffalo Wings", Dammit!

I was watching CNN when they ran a crawl about the winner of the "Buffalo Wing" eating contest. I know...outsiders have to put the geographic location in but the reality is they are chicken wings, plain and simple. Sonya "The Black Widow" Thomas who is 5'5 and 105 lbs. strapped on her feedbag to win the professional eating contest called "The Buffet Bowl". In eight minutes, she ate 5.95 pounds of wings, pizza, pierogies, beef and “hog wings.” Insert pig noise here.


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Now playing: Bryn Jones - Abuse
via FoxyTunes

Larry Craig and Co.: Knock it Off!

I'm really sick of prominent dudes pretending they're straight just to keep their jobs. I'm not certain of tea room etiquette but suffice it to say from the reports that have been released, Mr. Craig was casting his net. Little did he know Dragnet was in the next stall. Anyway, I understand that in our hypocritical society it is difficult for people to be who they are. But to be a tool for the right wing Republican faction while you're looking to get your bishop polished is in insane! There have been several of these scandals in the past few years. Last month, Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) had to apologize because his phone number appeared in the D.C. Madam's book. He didn't have to quit his post. No one seemed to care probably because he sought sex with a woman. Former Congressman Mark Foley chased after little boys and was forced to resign. The only respectable thing about him is that he wasn't married. I guess for me it boils down to if you can't keep it in your pants don't make a major, legal commitment! You have to feel sorry for a woman who either doesn't know her husband or she knows what's up but rather than leave she plays along.
Shortly, Craig is supposed to announce his resignation so some other Republican tool can be appointed. Hasta la taco buddy!

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Now playing: Chet Baker - There Will Never Be Another You
via FoxyTunes

Johnny Goo's Plastic Surgery

I don't know when it went down but I noticed that John Rzeznik (the artist formerly known as Johnny Goo) didn't look quite right when he and the Goos appeared on Sundance TV's "Live from Abbey Road" series. His face barely moved and his cheeks looked chipmunk-like. Conversely, Robby Takac kept it real--a few lines in his face but he looked like a hip 40 something dude. John looked like he was frozen in time. A former teen idol who is clinging to yesterday.

Yesterday, my pal 'French Fry' sent us a link announcing that John Rzeznik will be on an American Idol style show to decide who the next great American band will be. He'll be paired with has-been Sheila E (pictured above) who looks awful but I can't determine if it's age, bad surgery, or both. Nonetheless, the info pro in me dug a little deeper and John doesn't seem to be demure about where he got his new look. Unless he didn't give the surgeon permission to mention him as a customer. Dr. Mark Mandel-Brown is to blame according to this site. Notice the spelling on John's last name. As Kelly would say, you couldn't even spell "break" right!

See What Excessive Drinking Does?

"Oh Shit! She really does take after her dad!"




Famous first hard drinking daughter,Jenna Bush, will soon be a blushing bride. She recently became engaged to Henry Hager. His father is the head honcho for Virginia's Republican Party, a former First Lieutenant Governor, and he worked for the Bush II adminsistration. The younger worked for the soon defunct Karl Rove. Maybe he can be Jenna's brain.

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Now playing: Memphis Minnie - Love Come and Go
via FoxyTunes

Bingo Wings

Not to be confused with Buffalo Wings these are the things you earn after lots of eating and very little exercise. I've been trying to exercise more often. Especially after yesterday's hot fudge sundae from Aldridge's Ice Cream in Dunkirk. They're the place that has April Fool's day flavors like pork and beans. Their real flavors are very good and the whipped cream rules.

I Wanna a Super Fro

Here you go! Check out the afro puff!

Smell Phones

Children shouldn't have cell phones. I've outlined the many reasons I'm against it in previous posts. To recap, they're too young and don't understand the financial impact, they don't need to talk "on location"--tie up the family phone line, and it only gives them easy access to bullshit trouble i.e. Chester the Molester. Giving one to a troubled child only to have it become a point of contention in disciplinary matters lead to tragedy in this case.

Stupid Spoiled Whore

You gotta love the Smoking Gun--check the photo gallery!

Soylent Green

Our food is getting skanky. It started with the knarly pet food that killed cats and dogs. It was recently revealed that China's seafood supply is cultivated in raw sewage and washed with nasty chemicals that the FDA in the U.S. has banned. You need to get down with slow foods. A movement inspired by the overwhelming availability of corporate fast food. There are locations across the U.S. Many Web sites list farmers' markets and quality restaurants or special events where you can get a quality feedbag. Don't eat Soylent Green.
Off to the second most polluted city in America, Pittsburgh!

Nancy Grace Gets Punked

That's hot!

I'll Make Your Head Ring...

So, I'm enjoying a nice, 70's soulesque Sunday morning brunch before I start excavating my place in search of floors and a kitchen table when I stumble upon a Baaaahflo News article entitled, "Surviving a layoff How to manage in unemployment and find a new job", which was written by a local reporter. Considering that I just survived this experience, I was curious. Typical networking and "getting your priorities straight advice" was offered but so was this gem:

For those who are unmarried, but have an employed, insured significant other: “Wedding bells should be ringing in your head at this particular moment,” Lewis Mandell said.

Mandell is a professor of finance at UB. Is he fucking kidding? Let me get this right, if you're dating someone and your source of benjamins runs out, you're supposed to enter a legal entanglement to stave off hunger and the bill collectors? What if you're single and don't have this option? Do you start working for an escort service instead? I'll bet if Mandell were asked to consider the escort service option, he'd probably give it some thought. If Mandell was quoted correctly, what an incredibly ignorant thing to say. I'd rather starve than be tied down for the wrong reasons.

"Freedom"

I saw this image a few days ago on channel 4's Web site. What's wrong with this picture? If it's meant to commemorate Memorial Day, the graphics person is either on crack or a jokester. Doesn't this look like somebody's under siege rather than free? Sieg Heil!

Speaking of...I hate Elizabeth Hasselhoff, yeah I know it's ...beck, but she's a Republican crotch who's nothing but a former reality star married to a football mook. I was never a fan of Rosie O'Donnell's but I'll take butch over bitch anyday. See the final showdown here...

My Walter Mitty Dream

If you know me well enough, I'm a nerdy librarian who enjoys intellectual property issues. I wish I could figure out how to get down with an IP oriented career without a lot of extra schooling as I'm over obtaining way too much education for very little in return. I'm really good at busting misuse of copyright and trademark. Maybe I could be an IP criminal clearinghouse. I could cuff and stuff places around here big time but if I'm not getting paid in full, why bother playing Pepper from Police Woman?


Anyway, as the Sabres grapple for the Stanley Cup, the infringers come out of the woodwork as evidenced by this Baaaahflo News story. Sabres gear started selling like mad when the sloppy pizza eaters figured out that Da Bills were worth jackshit back in November. The linked article offers clues so you don't buy a forgery. Here's my favorite, "Another tip-off is spelling. The league has confiscated more than a few Sabres items labeled “Sabers.”" Ha-ha! These Bud Light swilling losers and street thugs trying to make a buck can actually sell misspelled items? PT Barnum's adage of a "sucker is born every minute" is entirely too true.

I'm nursing a cold so I'll watch the Sabres prolly soil the bed. I don't have a good feeling about this series.

Garden of Eden Lock-down

There's nothing better when TV parlance comes to real life. Case in point, yesterday's five hour search for a despondent Iraq War veteran with a gun in Eden, NY. It started around noon when the man's sister called police to report that her brother was armed and sounded as if he might kill himself. About 60 police officers from three agencies began looking for him. At around 1:30 school officials were notified of the situation. Rather than move the children, the media and school authorities notified parents that they should pick up their kids. Of course, the rumor mill kicked in and false reports of the distressed man being in the building started. A school official was quoted in the paper as saying, "We have a building full of kids with cell phones,”. Okay, rewind, what's wrong with that sentence? Those little brats were allowed to get their chat on? I thought the media and the school were doing the notifying. Nothing like letting the kids run the show! I left work yesterday afternoon and heard the "lock-down" term being bandied about as it always is in these situations. I always thought schools were prisons where you suffered through the bullshit of forced socialization. I couldn't wait to get out. I never thought the prison lexicon would be so commonplace--especially in light of Virginia Tech.